Carowinds-Family Time

Finally Realized…Parachute over me

If you hold your mouse over the link for a minute a small bax will appear after that has uploaded click play and you will be able to read the lyrics on my bolg while you listen. Ignore the video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKGTtY91GBc

One of my favorite songs. The way I see it, it is talking about how you think your going through these hard times in your life and you are just falling but then when you think it is too much you realize there is a parachute over you(God) and you really aren’t alone blindly falling. 

I cry everytime I hear this song.

Parachute By Guster

There we stand about to fly
Peeking down over land
Parachute behind
What was that moment for which we live?
Without a parachute about to dive
I find myself convincing
Blindly falling faster
How easy
Know the place I’m leaving
And the rest just is gone
Oh the adoration
But how much strength does it take
For exploration
For split decision
Or are you stronger to remain
I find myself convincing
Blindly falling faster
How easy
Know the place I’m leaving
And the rest is just gone
It crept up on me
Ignored all my pleas
Begging to leave
No justice to name me
Fell out of the sky 
It’s easy to be
Without a reply
Gravity fills me
And when I awoke
I knew what was real
Hope to convince you
Lies they all torture me
Opened the door
Knew what was me
I finally realized
Parachute over me

Parachute over me

parachute over me

Stand up for Something or Lie down in your Game…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tP1PXRiVoJw

This is dedicated to Celeste who at one point in time knew every word to this song.

I’ll See You When You Get There!

Now I’ve seen places and faces
And things you ain’t never thought about thinking
If you ain’t peek then you must be drinking and smokin’
Pretending that your lockin’ but you’re brokin’
Let me get you open now

Little Timmy got his diploma and, little Jimmy got life
And Tamikra around the corner
Just took her first hit off The pipe
The other homie shot the other homie
And ran off with his money
And when the other homies heard about it
They thought it was funny but who’s the dummy
Now you done lost a hustler
A down-a** brother got replaced by a buster
And though I got love for ya, I know I can’t trust you
Coz my crew is rollin’ numbers and
your crew is rollin’ duchess

And just because of that you act you don’t like a brother
No more, uh, I guess that’s just the way it goes
I ain’t tryina preach, I believe I can reach
But your mind ain’t prepared, I see you when you get there

1-I’ll see you when you get there
If you ever get there, see you when you get there
I’ll see you when you get there if you ever get there
See you when you get there

More temptation then faith
I guess we livin’ for today
I seen a man get swept off his feet by a boy with an AK
the situation so twisted everybody gettin lifted
I’m just tryin to take care of my kids
And handle my business coz it’s way too serious
So you gotta pay close attention
So you don’t get caught sittin’

When they come and do all the gettin’
Life is a big game so you gotta play it with a big horse
Someone’s gotta run a little faster
Coz we gotta lay the course I’d be a fool to surrender
When I know I can be a contender
if everybody’s a sinner then everybody could be
A winner, no matter you rag color deep down we all brothers
and regardless of the time somebody up there still love us
I’m a scuff and strugle y’all breathless and weak
I just strived my whole life to make it to the mountain peak
always keep reaching sure to grab on to something
I’ll be there when you get there when
you wit the sound bumpin’
(repeat 1, 1)

Verse 3: PS (40 Thevz)
You need to loosen up and live a little
and if you got kids let them know how you feel
and for your own sake give a little
oh, you don’t want to hear that
you busy tryina stack
and keep up with the Jones’s and taking advantage of your own
the realist homies that you been known for longest
but some ain’t missing a good thing until it’s gone
could have built an empire if not for the jelousy that divides
we prefer to keep our eyes shut to whats right when
it’s something wrong and we desire
so hold your head up high if your poor and righteous
I know time seems strife
the problems seem endless
in the time of despair we gotta put ourselves together
and if you feel you’re out the game then
you need to get back in it
coz that’s worse than a quitter
you gotta face responsibility one day, my brother
so gather up your pity and turn it to ambition
and put your vehicle in drive and stop by my side
(rpt 1, 1)

As we walk down the road of our destiny
and the time comes to chose which shall it be the wide and crooked or the strait and narrow 
we got one push to give and one life to live
stand up for something or lie down in your game
listen to the song that we sing
it’s up to you to make it be
I guess I’ll see you when you see me

Life’s Lessons

I just read a book called Sarah’s Quilt by Nancy Turner. I loved it! It is the sequel to These is My Words, another awesome book. These books seem so real to me. They deal with real themes in real life. There is no Prince Charming romance and no skating through life without hardships. There are strong characters who work hard and are brave and I admire their characteristics. Many of the themes Nancy Turner implements are true principles such as personal responsibility. One of the characters commits horrendous crimes but you begin to feel sorry for him and make excuses for him. In the end the reader is willing to except a heavy punishment for the character but definitely not the one he deserves. Nancy Turner, in her brilliance, doesn’t hold back and do what is so often done in our day and age…that is with holding justice and applying too much mercy…she carry’s on and teaches a pointed lesson about wrong choices and the consequences that evidently come from them. It was so sad and I even cried but it was as it should be. Too often these days young people are sheltered from the results of their choices and therefore do not learn the necessary lessons that propel them into successful adulthood.  I am not say that there shouldn’t be second or even third chances there definitely should be but every action has a reaction and we shouldn’t go through life never seeing or enduring the “reaction.” Another simple venue where this type of sheltering occurs is childhood sports and competition. Adults are so worried about making everyone feel good and equal that there is no true competition and no one is any better than the other. That is a nice sentiment but it is not reality and is not helpful in encouraging children to do better and try harder. There is no reward for being mediocre in this life and no one wins a prize for being just as good as everyone else. In elementary school when I was in 5th grade our class had to pick the fastest girl and the fastest boy to compete in a school wide race. It came down to me and a girl named Gloria. She beat me by a hair. I complained it wasn’t fair becasue she had longer legs than I did. But that didn’t matter and I didn’t get an award for being the fastest girl with short legs. Gloria went on to compete in the school wide race and I went on trying to be a faster runner with the realization that I probably wouldn’t make a career of running. Another time I was put into my place was when I was competing for the Moorehead Scholarship to Chapel Hill, a full ride. I made it to the semi-finals and then I simply wasn’t chosen. I didn’t do anything wrong and no one else cheated…I simply wasn’t as good as other competitors. That was a huge lesson for me. There are bigger fish in the see and I will not always be number one and that is OK. Life will keep on going and I will have to find my place in it and accept that place happily or live in bitter misery. There is no need to make excuses and rationalizations and it is ok to accept things as they are and you still have worth even though someone else is more talented than you. That is life. When people can’t accept the hard truths of life and keep their children from learning valuable lessons they go through life with a crutch never able to be happy for other people when they succeed and never able to admit responsibility for their own failure. It is difficult to see a loved one suffer and be sad and disappointed but they won’t ever learn the joy of success if they never fail.

My Papa

I love my Papa. He is the best grandparent ever! Since I can remember he has been an active part of my life. Taking us on trips when we were kids….the beach, Disneyland, Knotts Berry Farm, the park, the pool and I am sure many places I don’t remember. He made himself part of my life and has been a great influence on me. When I went to college he started emailing me and came to see me before I graduated. After I had Gus he came and visited again. All the way from Cal-i-forn-i-a. The last time he visited was with my Uncle Tom in May of ‘07 just before Eli was born. He and I just connect. There is no other way to explain it. We are peas in a pod. We are very similar in many respects and love each others company. Sure we come from different times and all but we see eye to eye on a lot of things and we are straight talkers. Sometimes I am surprised by the things my Papa says but then I laugh and think why should that surpriseme? The summer after my Freshman year in college he flew me out for a month. We pal-ed around Cali and he took me driving down to San Juan Capistrano and told me about growing up and the things he knew. I enjoyed my time with him but I wish I had known to savor it more. If I had only realized that I wouldn’t be that free in the next phase of my life….I might have listened a little longer and remembered a little more. I

this is from the visit in May '07.

now long to be able to fly out to Cali and spend a few days. It seemed so easy to do when I was unattached. One time I had a 3 hour lay over in Cali on my way to AZ and Pop picked me up and took me to breakfast. Sweet times. I haven’t flown in a plane for over 3 years and being grounded is grating on me. But back to the point. Pop posted a comment on my blog just the other day talking about my 30th birthday and wishing me well. He has never missed a birthday and I appreciate that. It is gratifying to know that I am loved and thought well of on distant shores. So, I just wanted to say. I love you Pop! Thanks for being an awesome grandfather!

The Library Consipracy

Once upon a time all of the librarians gathered for a meeting to discuss a pressing issue… mainly what to do about the library patrons getting something for nothing. They hired a “consultant” to determine ways for the library to make money without “making money”. “The consultant” reported back that the average person does not think in 3 week intervals. Meaning when a person checks a book out on the 4th of the month they would not easily think of or remember the date three weeks from that point. Whereas if it was a month later it woul dbe easy to remember. I checked it out on the 4th I return it on the 4th. Manageable.  Clever little idea  Mr. “Consultant”. Librarians all over the world then instituted this idea and the funds started rolling in. Sometimes I think they even add a little extra to mine thinking, “this one will never notice, she’s a scatter brain.” But I have noticed the outrageously high fees from time to time. I even argued for a while that it was cheaper for me to go to a book store and simply buy the book…at least I would have something to show for my money. I spent a little more than I would in fees though… so it was back to the library. The other day Gus wanted to check-out a CD-Rom. It turned out that it wasn’t compatible with our computer and he never played the game. A few days after it was due I realized it and went to return it but it was not to be found. I called the library to see how much it would cost and the librarian said $25! Well, there was no way I was paying $25 for a disc that didn’t even work. I went on-lineand found that I could buy the same disk only compatible with modern computers for $15 shipping included. I asked the librarian if replacing it would work and she said “no, it has the be the exact disc”. She then said she would waive the fee and that I shouldn’t worry about it. I said I would pay $15 since that is what the replacement would cost. She then told me that they wouldn’t be replacing it and that they were discontinuing their CD-Roms anyway and switching to download-ables. You mean you weren’t even gonna use the $25 to replace it anyway! Good thing I was a pain in the butt and didn’t just fork over the $25 up front.  Score! for the library patrons! But the Librarian are still way ahead and will continue to be as long as I can only check a book out in 3 week intervals and be expected to remember the due date. Curse you sneaky librarians!

 

P.S. I wrote this post previously and it was lost….the second time around wasn’t as good as the 1st. Sorry my mind could not recreate it.

Mason’s Talk

This talk was written by Mason Beaumont and is posted here with his permission.

My Soul Delighteth in the Things of the Lord

I have been asked to speak on how my soul delighteth in the things of the Lord and I have decided to focus my remarks on three things that have brought me the most joy in recent years.

First, I rejoice in the law of the Sabbath, one of the Ten Commandments.  Quoting the scriptures, President Spencer W. Kimball encouraged the saints to make the Sabbath a “delight” and to approach the day with “cheerful hearts and countenances.”  I didn’t always rejoice in this law.  I had a pretty hard time with it growing up.  I was pretty committed to not making purchases at the store or playing organized sports on this holy day, but I grew up in a family that gathered around the television to watch football games and listened to the top 40 countdown on the radio on our 20 minute drive to church.  Although I have some fun memories of some of those days, over the years, my justifications for theses activities began to erode.  As a missionary in Brazil I became frustrated at times with some of the indecency and vulgarity that the members would allow on their TV’s especially when we came to visit them on Sunday.  It was very shocking to see as a missionary and made me rethink my own Sabbath Day observance when I wasn’t in the mission field. 

 

It was shortly after returning home from my mission that I returned to school at UNC and met Julie. She was on a kick about keeping the Sabbath Day holy and she had invited me over for dinner and to read Jesus the Christ with her. I had homework due the next morning, having put it off until Sunday, but Julie twisted my arm and finally convinced me to hang out with her instead. She challenged me to stop doing homework on Sunday and to start right then by simply getting up earlier on Monday to finish my homework.  I took her challenge and was blessed for it.  Later, I challenged her to marry me and since then we have remained committed together to a stricter observance of the Sabbath Day.

 

And 4 kids later this has proven to be a huge blessing. Although, we’ve had to change our focus from ourselves and our gospel study to teaching the children how they can keep the Sabbath Day holy. We have come up with ways to occupy their time and teach them the gospel. This has brought us closer together as a family and helped us regularly spend quality time together.

 

I rejoice in the law of tithing. Even before I had any income I was taught the importance of paying a full tithe and the miraculous blessings that could come from it.  I loved the story from our church history of Lorenzo Snow taking over as prophet and president of a church that was in debt and traveling to St. George, Utah where there had been a drought.  He received a revelation and promised rain if the members would pay a full tithe.  It rained after about 2-1/2 months of paying their tithing.  It was a miracle – I guess I was always fascinated at the temporal, or outward and obvious blessings that were promised and came as a result of paying an honest tithe.  The scripture comes from the Old Testament in the book of Malachi, chapter 3 verse 8, which reads:

“8 ¶ ^aWill a man ^brob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In ^ctithes and offerings.

  9 Ye are ^acursed with a curse: for ye have robbed me, even this whole nation.

  10 Bring ye all the ^atithes into the storehouse, that there may be ^bmeat in mine house, and ^cprove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not ^dopen you the ^ewindows of heaven, and pour you out a ^fblessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it.

  11 And I will ^arebuke the ^bdevourer for your sakes, and he shall not destroy the fruits of your ground; neither shall your vine cast her fruit before the time in the field, saith the Lord of hosts.

  12 And all nations shall call you blessed: for ye shall be a delightsome land, saith the Lord of hosts.”

 

I think I also rejoiced in (enjoyed) the literal fulfillment of these promises when the windows of heaven were truly opened and a blessing was literally poured out upon the saints in Utah in that time of drought.  Being a very logically minded person, I would have a hard time sometimes in my youth understanding all the symbolism of allegories, parables, and the words of Isaiah, So I guess I could say that I was like Nephi when he said, “my soul delighteth in plainness unto my people, that they may learn.” (2Nephi 25:4).  Tithing is a law that is plain and easy to understand.  The Lord has given us everything we possess, including our health and strength and talents and abilities, and therefore, anything we gain in this life is because the Lord has allowed us to do so and all he requires of us is to give back 10% - not a complicated tax code with tax brackets, exemptions, deductions, etc…  Just a simple flat rate of one-tenth, which makes the sacrifice just as easy for the rich as it does the poor.  The amount may be different, but the sacrifice is the same.  My parents also set a good example for me by taking us children to tithing settlement with the Bishop at the end of each year and when I would earn an allowance for income, I would have the opportunity to experiment my faith in this gospel principle and declare my status.  The scripture in Malachi talks about proving the Lord by obeying the commandment he has given and see whether or not he pours out a blessing upon you.  I delight in this challenge to prove the Lord – not that I have ever paid tithing with any specific expectation – meaning, I have never budgeted for expected blessings that come from tithing, but I always expect some sort of temporal blessing to come.  Some could argue that the blessings I have identified as a result of paying a full tithe are merely circumstantial and unrelated, but I would call them ungrateful and prideful for not recognizing the hand of the Lord in our lives, whether he blesses through some miraculous way or through the circumstances that surround us.  This past year has been particularly full of these blessings for our family and as soon as they started to occur, I was prompted to write down the specific blessing that seemed so clearly the result of our obedience to this law of tithing.  I would like to share a few of them with you today…

Julie had needed her wisdom teeth removed for a long time, but because the anesthesia was not safe for pregnant or nursing mothers, we had to put it off for pretty much our entire marriage.  Well, after repeated suggestions from our dentist to remove them before they caused other complications and in a year (last year) that we had already met our out-of-pocket maximum for health insurance, Julie decided it was time.  Although, after scheduling the appointment with the Oral Surgeon, we discover that they and all other oral surgeons in the area are not in our Insurance Company’s provider network and that we would have to pay full price.  After having to pay all of our deductibles and co-insurance for Eli’s heart surgery, we had already spent all the money in our savings accounts and were only a couple months away from starting 2008 with new deductibles and co-insurance for the year.  I was afraid that we wouldn’t have the money to get Julie’s wisdom teeth out, but I didn’t want her to postpone any longer what she has had to put off for years, until a few days later when I was reconciling our checking account to my checkbook and realized that I had forgotten to include a deposit of $657.47 from our Health Savings Account from a couple months back – a mistake that ended up keeping us from going in the red, or into debt. 

Then, shortly after thanking the Lord for blessing us with his tender mercies, we come to find out that Eli’s heart condition would require a seasonal vaccine against Respiratory Syncytial Virus (or RSV), a monthly injection from November through April costing $2,800 each.  November and December were covered, but again, our deductible would reset in the new year and again I was afraid we wouldn’t have the money to cover these without going into debt.  And then out of nowhere, in February or March of this year we received a check in the mail from our mortgage company saying that we over-paid our property taxes into our escrow account and so they were refunding it, almost all of it.  Of course, we called their tax department to make sure there was no mistake and it turned out, something to the effect that, because our land was appraised before our house was built on it, we only had to pay taxes on the land for 2007.  It was a miracle and it helped pay the medical bills that were beginning to accumulate.  We thanked our Heavenly Father once again and our faith increased.

Well, then the bills kept coming, the economy started to turn south as a result of the sub-prime mortgage crisis and gas prices breaking record highs every other day… and in the midst of all this, an unprecedented announcement comes out from the federal government that in order to stimulate the economy, they will be sending checks to every person filing tax returns – I couldn’t believe it.  Our medical bills were now covered and it didn’t look as if the gas prices would kill us just yet.  We thanked the Lord for pouring out blessing after blessing.

And if that wasn’t enough, I had been working in Internal Audit for Ingersoll Rand for a couple years and Julie was feeling the stress and getting a little tired of the travel it required.  I started looking for a job within the same company, but outside the department, with the support of my managers around the end of last year, right before the company announced they will acquire Trane, a company roughly ¾ the size of Ingersoll Rand with almost as many employees, including another audit department; only that the new company was not planning to double the size of the audit department, so, I started exploring opportunities outside the company, realizing that I would probably be the first one to be laid off considering my expressed desire to stop traveling.  By May, it had come down to two very different job offers: one that offered a very nice salary, but contained a lot of uncertainty as to the people I would be working with and the duties that would be required of me; and the other was a company that I had known as an audit client and had already enjoyed working with the accounting staff, but that offered a lower salary and expensive health benefits that would make it difficult to continue living with all of the current bills that we were paying.  Julie and I spent a lot of time weighing costs and benefits, or pros and cons of taking either job.  And when we had an idea of what we should do, even though we didn’t want to admit it because it would require some sacrifices on our part, we went to the temple to pray about it and received a confirmation of our decision to take the lower paying job, trusting that the Lord would bless us with the things we needed.  Well, we did not think it was possible, but because of the timing of my decision to take the new job occurring after the acquisition date of the new company, I was informed that I had the option of  receiving a severance package and be considered laid off instead of quitting.  It was another miracle that made it possible to pay for the more expensive health insurance with the new company and will allow us to reach our goal of an emergency food supply of one year.  We are still thanking the Lord through prayer and fasting for that one and our testimonies are strong.

 

 

 

I rejoice in the blessings of my Mission. Serving a Mission in Brazil was a wonderful experience. One of the greatest joys today from my mission 9 years ago is the lasting friendships I have made with converts, members, and missionary companions.  After my mission I wrote to people I had met every once in a while, but that became difficult because it took so long to get a response.  However, when I started working for Ingersoll-Rand I was able to travel to Brazil a few times and I made it a point of going back to my mission and visiting with old friends. Through my visits over the past 2 years I have been able to reunite with a couple good friends and even though I had to come to the reality that not everyone I baptized is in the bishopric or presidency, but that some were no longer active members, I still was almost overwhelmed with joy to reunite with them, especially those that were still faithful members.  One was baptized during my mission as a single mother of four and now she is sealed in the temple to a returned missionary from her ward and they have since had two more children together.  I could relate a little bit to how Ammon felt when he was reunited with Alma and the other sons of Mosiah after their 14 years apart on their missions, although my joy did not exhaust my strength.  And now, with the few of them that have internet connections, I have regular contact through email and instant messaging. It is such a blessing to be able to converse with them in real time.  I enjoy hearing news of how the church keeps growing down there and learning more and more about their lives. It humbles me when I am reminded of how easy life is for me compared to them and this helps me to be grateful for all I have and be generous with it.  I hope to be able to take my family to Brazil in the near future to meet these wonderful people and to share my joy with them.

 

I testify to you that Sabbath Day observance, paying a full tithe, and service to the Lord reap eternal blessings of great joy.  “When we delight to serve Him, our Father in Heaven delights to bless us.  ‘I, the Lord, …delight to honor those who serve me in righteousness and in truth unto the end” (D&C 76:5).  I say these things…

My Talk

You might recognize a few stories from my previous posts. Sorry for the repeat.

I am the type of person who doesn’t like stress. I really try to avoid it. If there is something that is causing me stress I try to find a way to eliminate it from my life. That being said there are something’s that cause stress that simply can not be eliminated….for example children they can cause lots of stress so instead of eliminating them I eliminate scenarios that cause extra stress with children. In recent months I have been feeling very stressed and trying to figure out where I could eliminate stress. Well, unfortunately I zeroed in on being a member of the church. Being a member of the church causes stress. It does. There are so many responsibilities as a member from the basic doing what is right to fulfilling your calling, being a VT’er, missionary work…and the list goes on..But paradoxically I am also someone who is a goodie goodie. I am pretty diligent about choosing the right. Partly because any time I have done something wrong I feel an extreme amount of guilt. My own personal torture. So I have made it a point in my life to always try to do what is exactly right. Consequently these thoughts about the church causing me stress have caused me a lot of guilt. Then I receive a call from Bother Johnson and he asks me to give a talk and tells me the topic is the conference talk given by Susan Tanner entitled…    

My Soul Delighteth in the Things of the Lord

I kind of smirked to myself when he told me and I thought “Ok, Heavenly Father, fine I will stop being a punk.” What I didn’t realize was that there was a greater lesson that he was about to teach me.

The talk itself kind of rubbed me the wrong way. I didn’t really identify with a lot of what Sister Tanner was talking about. Her life is very different than mine. But there were a few things I could relate to. One thing that resonated with me and what I will focus my talk on is the subject of “tender mercies” Sister Tanner said,

“I delight in the Lord’s mercies and miracles (see “Bless Our Fast, We Pray,” Hymns, no. 138). I know that His tender mercies and His miracles, large and small, are real. They come in His way and on His timetable. Sometimes it is not until we have reached our extremity. Jesus’s disciples on the Sea of Galilee had to toil in rowing against a contrary wind all through the night before Jesus finally came to their aid. He did not come until the “fourth watch,” meaning near dawn. Yet He did come. (See Mark 6:45–51.) My testimony is that miracles do come, though sometimes not until the fourth watch.”

This past year or so I have been introduced to the topic of tender mercies and really have been able to point them out in my life. I can look back to my past and see time and time again the tender mercies of the Lord in my life. Elder David Bednar gave a talk a couple of Conferences ago on

The Tender Mercies of the Lord

He started off quoting a scripture from 1 Ne 1:20 that reads as follows.

“But behold, I, Nephi, will show unto you that the tender mercies of the Lord are over all those whom he hath chosen, because of their faith, to make them mighty even unto the power of deliverance” (1 Ne. 1:20).”

Elder Bednar says, “I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are real and that they do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence. Often, the Lord’s timing of His tender mercies helps us to both discern and acknowledge them.”

“the Lord’s tender mercies are the very personal and individualized blessings, strength, protection, assurances, guidance, loving-kindnesses, consolation, support, and spiritual gifts which we receive from and because of and through the Lord Jesus Christ. Truly, the Lord suits “his mercies according to the conditions of the children of men” (D&C 46:15).”

“Recall how the Savior instructed His Apostles that He would not leave them comfortless. Not only would He send “another Comforter” (John 14:16), even the Holy Ghost, but the Savior said that He would come to them (see John 14:18). Let me suggest that one of the ways whereby the Savior comes to each of us is through His abundant and tender mercies. For instance, as you and I face challenges and tests in our lives, the gift of faith and an appropriate sense of personal confidence that reaches beyond our own capacity are two examples of the tender mercies of the Lord. Repentance and forgiveness of sins and peace of conscience are examples of the tender mercies of the Lord. And the persistence and the fortitude that enable us to press forward with cheerfulness through physical limitations and spiritual difficulties are examples of the tender mercies of the Lord.”

Some examples of Tender Mercies that have occurred recently in my life are connected to my son Eli. For those of you who don’t know Eli was born with a heart condition called Pulmonary Valve Stenosis. He was in the Neonatal Intensive Care unit for 17 days after he was born and has had 2 heart caths and had Open-Heart Surgery when he was 3 months old. Since his surgery he has stabilized and has been symptom free. When he was 11 months old the following occurred. This is an excerpt from my journal: On the weekend of Talia’s birthday party my brother and his family were here for a few days. On Saturday they received a call from their doctor saying the sore under their 2 year old son Hyrum’s arm was strep. Unfortunately, Eli had been in direct contact with Hyrum and the following week I watched him closely. During Wed night and Thursday morning he had a fever of 100.7. So I went ahead and called the doctor and scheduled an appointment. Interestingly enough, he had an ear infection (which my kids rarely get). The doctor said it was probably a strep bacteria that settled in his ear. I did not know that children under 2 do not usually get strep throat but have the bacteria settle somewhere else. SO Eli started anti-biotics. The amoxicillan had been giving him diarrhea and he had been fussy. I was thinking of trying to stop the anti-biotics early when I came across and article on-line that said: “Why is it very important to detect and treat a strep throat?

The condition known as rheumatic fever is a disease that affects the joints and heart and is caused by untreated or inadequately treated strep infection. Rheumatic fever can cause damage to the heart valves. Fortunately, it is now uncommon in the current antibiotic era.”

I, of course, as the paranoid mom of a cardiac patient called the Cardiologist’s office right away just to make sure we were doing everything we should do. They said to make sure he finishes his anti-biotics and give him yogurt for the tummy troubles.  

This to me was one of those “wow” moments when you think “what if?” What if my sister-in-law Celeste had not asked the doctor at her baby Eliza’s Dr’s appointment to look at the sore under her 2 year old Hyrum’s arm and what if the Doctor had not decided to swab it just to see what it was…I would not have been on the look out for signs of strep and would not have gone to the doctor the same day the symptoms showed up the strep infection would have gone untreated or maybe never diagnosed ….who knows what would have happened. But the Lord knows just how much I can handle and he knows how to show me he is there and he cares about me and my family. Many times the Lord sends blessing our way that seem small but really are remarkable.

Elder Bednar also said:

“Faithfulness, obedience, and humility invite tender mercies into our lives, and it is often the Lord’s timing that enables us to recognize and treasure these important blessings.”

“We should not underestimate or overlook the power of the Lord’s tender mercies. The simpleness, the sweetness, and the constancy of the tender mercies of the Lord will do much to fortify and protect us in the troubled times in which we do now and will yet live. When words cannot provide the solace we need or express the joy we feel, when it is simply futile to attempt to explain that which is unexplainable, when logic and reason cannot yield adequate understanding about the injustices and inequities of life, when mortal experience and evaluation are insufficient to produce a desired outcome, and when it seems that perhaps we are so totally alone, truly we are blessed by the tender mercies of the Lord and made mighty even unto the power of deliverance (see 1 Ne. 1:20).”

Two blessings we have seen occur because of Eli’s heart condition are as follows: Here is another excerpt from my journal: Today I babysat a 10 month old girl. I have a special connection with this kid. She consumed about 90 ounces of my breast milk when she was a baby. She was allergic to formula and her mom had not planned on breast feeding. It just so happened that because Eli was in the NICU and didn’t eat very much while he was on prostiglandins I had a huge supply of breast milk in the freezer. Then this family who had only been in our ward for a few months has a baby and an extraordinary need. What are the chances? I have never heard of a baby being allergic to all types of formula before and I haven’t heard of a case since. I think it was just one of the many miracles God performs. Our lives intricately woven together. We really can’t separate ourselves from others. We are supposed to be connected and God reminds us of that every now and then. So, I have a special bond with this little baby and it was rather enjoyable to watch her today. It was just magical to see her and Eli playing with each other knowing that Eli’s struggle was able to give her something she desperately needed.

Another blessing that came from Eli’s troubles was that because we maxed out our insurance with his medical bills we decided to have Mason checked for colon and stomach cancer. It runs in his family and we knew for a while now that he needed to be checked. We decided that since it would be covered by our insurance 100% that we would go ahead with the procedure. It turned out that Mason had one large polyp in his colon that was pre-cancerous. The doctor removed it and he has regular check-ups. If Eli had not come along who knows how long it would have been till Mason was checked and by then the polyp probably would have turned cancerous. That is a definite tender mercy of the Lord.

Elder Bednar continues in his talk to explain that

The word chosen in 1 Nephi 1:20 [1 Ne. 1:20] is central to understanding the concept of the Lord’s tender mercies. The dictionary indicates that chosen suggests one who is selected, taken by preference, or picked out. It also can be used to refer to the elect or chosen of God (Oxford English Dictionary Online, second ed. [1989], “Chosen”).

To be or to become chosen is not an exclusive status conferred upon us. Rather, you and I ultimately determine if we are chosen. Please now note the use of the word chosen in the following verses from the Doctrine and Covenants:

“Behold, there are many called, but few are chosen. And why are they not chosen?

“Because their hearts are set so much upon the things of this world, and aspire to the honors of men” (D&C 121:34–35; emphasis added).

I believe the implication of these verses is quite straightforward. God does not have a list of favorites to which we must hope our names will someday be added. He does not limit “the chosen” to a restricted few. Rather, it is our hearts and our aspirations and our obedience which definitively determine whether we are counted as one of God’s chosen.”

I have been pondering this idea all week and it has really brought me peace. As one who works extremely hard at doing the right things all of the time I find myself overwhelmed and lost in a sea of work. This concept is so comforting because it says all of that work is worth something.  “Hold on you” say isn’t all of that work for your salvation? Well, yes but I can work hard all of my life making the right choices and another person who had struggled to make the right choices and chosen a different path has the ability to repent and therefore end up in essentially the same place I am. The question is “Why can’t I go inactive for a while? Why can’t I take a break? I can repent and come back later when life doesn’t seem as hard.” For me having the promise of these tender mercies is a great reason. Life is tough and no matter how hard you try to do what is right and live your life the best way you can there are things you can not control. There are hardships you can not foresee and can not avoid. There are trials and pain and they come to all of us no matter what. That is part of being human. But choosing the right and holding steadfast gives us the promise of seeing the Lord’s mercy and allowing him to provide a parachute for us when we are falling fast. I will willingly face the stress of living the gospel to the fullest if I know it means the Lord will send extra help when I am in the trenches of life.

Elder Bednar said, “the Father’s work is to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of His children. Our work is to keep His commandments with all of our might, mind, and strength—and we thereby become chosen and, through the Holy Ghost, receive and recognize the tender mercies of the Lord in our daily lives.

Brothers and Sisters I delight in the justice of God and in his tender mercies and am so thankful for the opportunity I have to choose to be chosen and allow God’s love to flow freely in my life.  

 

 

 

Delight

I have to give a talk on Sunday about “My Soul Delighteth in the Things of the Lord.” Anyone want to share the things their soul delight’s in? There was a Conference talk about his and the woman listed off a bunch of things she delights in. I don’t really identify with her tone or her experiences so I thought of some of my own but am curious what others of you out there think.

Comment away!

Snyder A.K.A. Rattlesnake

Well, I can’t help but think of BJay Smith when I think of Snyder. After all he was in the car when Snyder was named. We were on a desert road in Arizona and decided we couldn’t drive my 83 Honda Civic cross-country with out title-ing it. So the very next street sign we saw was to be his given name. Later, as I got to know Synder better I affectionately gave him the nickname of Rattlesnake what with all of the exhaust pipe serenading he perpetually gave how could I call him anything else.  So, after paying a couple of hundred dollars to bust Snyder out of the shop and a title pass off from my Dad (thanks Dad for my 1st car) BJay and I set off into the sunrise for our USA tour. We drove all day and all night and made it to NC in 33 hours. Okay, BJay drove all day and night and I gave him a break every now and then. I was 17 and just recently licenced so I didn’t have much driving endurance but with the help of Snyder’s trusty tape deck I stayed awake listening to Les Mis in the early hours of the morning coasting us into OK. I was pretty proud of myself I think I drove 3 hours in a row while BJay slept. He probably thought I was a real wimp. The other time I remember driving was in the Appalachian Mtns at night and BJay was again sleeping. I don’t think he knew it but I was really mad at him for sleeping cause I was so scared to drive through the mtns at night surrounded by big rigs. But I made it through and was all the more the Ultimate Buff Snake for it.

Snyder was under my care for the next 5 or so years of my life. I think it was pretty much the last 5 or so years of his life (we were notified by the NC Departmentof Transportation that he was left sitting on the side of the road and subsequently towed to a yard where no one claimed him shortly after Mason and I sold him. All for a lousy $800 how could I have been so cruel?).

Many a times Snyder left me stranded. Chillin’ out on the side of the road catching a ride from a kind soul to get to work at Great Harvest. I thought I was gonna end up as one of those “That’s why you don’t take rides from strangers” stories one time, but I was protected from harm and was only 30 minutes late to work. Snyder was tricky because he only acted up for me. He often would dump me on the side of the road and when I came back he would work for a while before giving out again. The guys at the car shop didn’t believe me until I drove less than a mile from their shop and broke down in the middle of the road. I marched right back to the shop and said I told you I didn’t make it up. Who wants to be stuck on the side of the road? Alas, I am a female and therefore am not worthy to discuss automotive issues. I learned that the hard way when the starter blew. My friend Paul towed me to three different shops and it wasn’t until he went in and talked to the mechanics that they agreed to take a look and eventually hot-wired my car for me so I could at least get back to Carthage where the guys at Goober’s fixed it up for me.  I had to “dumb it up” for the mechanic guys and act all sweet so they would want to take care of me. Couldn’t stand that! Rattlesnake’s little quirks endeared him to me. For example, the tape deck after a while it only worked when I banged it just so…otherwise I would drive in silence. The other thing was the um..windshield wipers. They only worked when I jiggled the control to turn them on and only then with lots of coaxing. RainX and I became fast friend. I tried to get them fixed but the mechanics said it was more trouble than it was worth. So, I kept jiggling.

I guess it was during my pregancy with Gus we decided it would be bad if I was stuck on the road so we decided to upgrade to a ‘97 Honda Civic, my dream car, too bad Mason took charge of it when I was designated as a minivan mom. I never named any of my cars since Snyder I guess I would have better feelings toward my current auto if we got to know each other on a 1st name basis. I am still bitter about being stuck on the side of the road on New Year’s Day just after we bought it. I guess I can forgive and move on….but can Snyder truley be replaced?